Something Different

I have a busy day ahead of me today, so I thought that for a change of pace I would post the prologue to a book that I'm beginning work on. It was inspired by the non-Christian band "Clutch," in their song "Guild of Mule Assassins." Yes, funny name for a song (and a band, for that matter...), but every time I hear it, that stupid song gets my creative juices flowing. I wrote the first few chapters when we were vacationing in Prague for Christmas, so Prague is literally woven into the fabric of this story. I really miss that place.

Okay, enough lamenting. Here you go:

Sir,

Please allow me to introduce myself. As department head for the University of Terra's Anthropology Department, I have had the privilege of scouring the universe for unique artifacts left behind by extra-terrestrials on colonized worlds. While our accomplishments and finds are few in number, those that we have found are earth-shattering and extraordinarily revealing about the universe that we live in.

Perhaps you recall the discovery of the religious stones on Altair VI? That was one of our most publicized projects that I personally oversaw.

Normally, when an artifact or a site is discovered, we have more than enough resources at our disposal to make accurate time/date stamps. There is also more than enough physical and observable evidence to make highly accurate suppositions about the races which left the artifacts behind.

However, recently we have uncovered an object that, for lack of a better phrase, has dumbfounded all of the collective expertise at our disposal.

After much discussion, my colleagues and I decided that you and your firm may be able to lend your services to our problem. Rest assured that your usual fee, plus any additional expenses that you may occur, will be covered by the University. It can be assumed, therefore, that you will have a so-called "blank check" to work with.

All that said, let me explain the scenario, and let you choose for yourself whether you'd like to take the case.

Roughly one solar year ago, a strange cylinder, measuring nearly one meter in length and about half as much in diameter, was discovered on Santos. It was buried thirty meters beneath the surface, and was found where construction was beginning on an Arcology. We were immediately contacted, and myself along with my usual team were dispatched with much anticipation.

We spent three months excavating the site. While we were unable to find any other artifacts, the cylinder was more than enough to occupy our attention. Once we were sure that there were no further artifacts, we brought the cylinder back to the University for analysis.

At first, it seemed as though the cylinder were empty. There were no discernible means of opening the cylinder, so after running several tests and scans to ensure that nothing inside would be damaged, I made the decision to have it cut open. Imagine our shock when, after opening the cylinder, we discovered a strange sort of data-storage device!

While we were unable at first to read the data contained on the device, we immediately hired a team of Terra's finest reverse-engineers to construct a device that would be able to read the data on the device. Our last task was to have the University’s A.I. translate everything into modern English.

I remember the day that we sat down to begin pouring over the data like it was yesterday.

As we started, I could scarcely believe what I was reading. A stunning, epic account unfolded before our very eyes. We sat, my team and I, transfixed for days, taking few breaks for personal comfort. What makes this account so incredible is that the beings and civilizations described are obviously human. At the end of the epic account, an incredible debate arose among us. Since it was impossible to date either the cylinder or the data device, we were left solely with the information contained on the device as evidence.

There are many among our colleagues who believe that the events that are described in the account took place many, many millenia ago. There are just as many colleagues who think that, through some as-yet-unknown phenomena, the information was somehow transported back in time to Santos, where it was buried by natural environmental means.

After much more debate, we are hoping that you and your team of forensic scientists can help shed some light on this issue. Perhaps you will notice something that my team and I have missed. I have attached the entire document with this message. Additionally, I also took the liberty of having an A.I. re-construct the entire account, so you may view it as a video, if you so wish. Of course, all translations have been made, so that you can wither watch or read in Modern English.

After you have reviewed the information, please take your time in replying as to whether or not you and your firm can aid us.

I look forward, with great anticipation, to receiving a response from you at your earliest convenience!